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Visit Holly's blog about Human empowerment.

child loss Tag

As other mothers sent their kiddos off to the first day of school today, I made my way to the place where my son died. I haven’t been there since Mason took his own life. I couldn’t go, couldn’t be there, couldn’t see where our lives ended. Until today. My friend’s...

I’ve been on a purge bender lately and I’ve never felt more clarity. Bags and bags of trash, gone. Trunk loads of donations for the Goodwill, delivered. It’s a cleanse of epic proportions and I’m really enjoying myself. Something clicked for me recently and I’m following the prompt to a...

Sometimes we find ourselves in a tough moment. Maybe we created it; maybe it was imposed upon us. Either way, it’s a bad one. We all have bad moments. Sad moments. Scary moments. Sometimes we land in a good moment. A great moment. A lovely one, a happy one. Moments. Our...

Showering has become an issue again. I just cannot force myself to do it regularly. It’s strange how things that were such a high priority once upon a time have become such an unbearable chore. For a year, I wrote and wrote and wrote. I wrote about my feelings, my...

A friend of mine calls it itchy feet… that feeling he gets when it’s time to go Walkabout. It’s a restlessness that begins in the heart and metastasizes throughout the soul. A niggling thought that if left ignored, can become a major distraction. I have itchy feet! I have a...

Christmas is my favorite holiday. Was. Christmas was my favorite holiday. I’d deck the house from top to bottom with Christmas décor and my home became a winter wonderland. I remember pulling into the garage one afternoon, sometime in April, and seeing all of the storage bins full of Christmas...

Sometimes, I think I get so distracted with thoughts of death that I limit my ability to focus on life. When I realize I am doing that, the pendulum swings radically in the other direction and I am determined to laugh a little louder, breathe a little deeper, and suck...

Halloween has never been my thing. Oh, I did it up for Mase ‘cause that’s what mamas do, but it’s never been the holiday that really tripped my trigger. Now, even less so. Mase, age 3 As I sip my coffee and consider my evening plans, I’m wondering, “What does a childless...

I saw him in my dream a few nights ago and he was so beautiful! In his early 20's and so amazingly handsome and confident, he had a backpack slung over one shoulder and a relaxed grin on his face. He showed up to travel with me. I was so...

It’s strange to be writing this because I still feel like I am living in a dream, a nightmare of the worst kind. I still hope I will wake up on June 3rd, 2013, and have a chance to do it all over again and save my son’s life. But...